I’m not sure I understand it. I mean, this motherfucker is ugly as shit. Sir, are all those facial tattoos really necessary? The fact that he’s 26 scares the hell out of me. Am I gonna look like that in a couple of years? He has a face only a mother could love, but I really want to hang out with him one day. Also, I’m sorry I raped your friends page with that mug.

I sound like someone straight out of that Stuff White People Like blog.

But I do. Smoke a joint with him, watch him play air guitar and talk shit about how he’s always nominated for awards, but never wins. But when he whines, he has to talk in the same tone as his rapping – the prepubescent voice of a 13-year-old boy. And we’ll be such close homeboys, he’ll let me listen to his rock album before anyone else does, and he’ll say, “Yo, you a white boy. Tell me wutchoo thank.” And I’ll say, “Weezy, turn that shit up” but in a really white boy way. And he’ll bust my balls about it, but I won’t say shit about it because in reality, his “rock” album sucks and well, what do we expect from Wayne? But he tried (For the record, his new single “Prom Queen” is just awful. Don’t believe me? Youtube it)

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