I know you read this thing. The even weirder thing is that you pretend you don’t, but the other night you asked me about something I wrote in here, so that was that. And I don’t mind. I like my Tennessee girls.

I’m sorry I ditched you at your party. And I’m sorry that your parents didn’t like me after that, even though I made them dinner (per your request). I’m sorry I never wanted to take things further than where we were, but I had to hit the brakes and take it slower than the lightning speed we were already moving.

I’m also sorry you didn’t tell me you were seeing Chad on the side but that it was okay because “you don’t even know what you want anyway” and you “wanted something a little more secure” than me. I guess I can’t blame you.

I’m sorry that I was bitter toward the end about it and that I started seeing his ex’s little sister immediately after we split. I really did like her – it wasn’t me seeking revenge on you. I know girls, and I know (usually) when they break up with someone, they couldn’t give a fuck less what the other person does. So when I did, it wasn’t out of spite like you think it was. And I’m sorry that it made you more upset than I thought it would, but really, you and I broke even.

The thing that really broke my heart was that you took something I told you, and only you, and you used it against me. You knew it would hurt me, but your feelings meant more than mine, and you didn’t care about anyone but yourself. Fortunately, most of our friends became my friends and made Team Jacob shirts to sell at the Honda Civic Tour. You lost. You played the game harder than I did, and you still lost.

I tried to play it cool with you. When we first started talking, I remember telling a buddy, “She is so much more awesome than I ever thought she could be.” It’s hard for me to still think that way, but maybe you’ll grow up one day, and when you stop breaking up married couples, give me a call.

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