Hmm. Well, we’ve already heard the cactus story, so that one’s out. How about the story of the girl and the turtle? Because turtles practically live forever, and the girl wanted a friend for life. So she bought a turtle,…

Link: My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2009-5-10)

1. No Doubt (347) 
2. The Smiths (270) 
3. Cursive (134) 
4. The Killers (91) 
5. Descendents (42) 

Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz

Once upon a time, there was a very large cactus. For a very long time, it stood all alone, very dry and ashy. And then, one day, another cactus came along, and she was very pretty. And all her pointy…

Do you know why I’m writing this tonight?

One. You’re completely and wonderfully beautiful and spectacular, and I think you’ve got to be the cutest, sweetest thing I’ve ever come across.
Two. Well, you’re short. And everyone knows Jake…

Once upon a time, there was this tall, dumb boy with a head the size of a dinner plate and legs like a little teensy kid and eyes that sparkled in the sun. And this boy, he was used to…

brb moving the furniture.