1. Perfect. Opening. Ever.
2. Britney looks great but I think she forgot her pants.
3. Oh, shut up, Taylor Swift.
4. I think Beyonce just grabbed her balls…
5. lolz Beyaki’s drummer looks like a butch Rihanna.
6. Damn, girl. Get up off the

…

I was sitting with the other kids in my class in a giant circle playing Duck Duck Goose. Any time a girl was up, I was always picked to chase her around. I didn’t have freakishly long spider legs back…

I’m coming (that’s what she said).