First of all, I have beef with anyone who says something to the effect of, “I listen to everything except country lolz.” When did country music turn into something you’re ashamed to listen to? I will be the first to admit that country music has been on a slippery downward slope since the late 90s. Once I was old enough to listen to music on my own, we were already listening to bullshit artists like LeAnn Rimes and Shania Twain. Even worse was the introduction of Rascal Flatts to country radio stations nationwide. Hell yeah, if that’s what country music is, then I would also want no part of it. It’s pussy music now. Half of the new guys are borderline gay men/closet cases (I’m looking in your direction, Kenny Chesney), and country music isn’t about pansy ass musicians whining about their girlfriends and how they remind them of their pickup truck. It used to be about keeping up the appearance of a rugged cowboy singing about drinking whiskey and embarrassing themselves in front of a group of people. The closest thing we’ve had to a cowboy since the 90s is Toby Keith, but that guy is the most ignorant piece of shit in the world and he ruined what could have been a country music comeback by opening his mouth and spewing his political bullshit. I miss Garth Brooks and Brooks & Dunn. I miss strong voices like George Strait and how someone like him could get away with singing love songs because of his voice and how he resembled the Marlboro Man. Now we have the fucker from Rascal Flatts who looks like a fat version of Lance Bass, and this shit is popular? To who? Not any self-respecting person. To recent high school graduates who are off to their first year at Texas A&M.

I’m sorry to any of you who think Taylor Swift is acceptable country music. Actually, no, I’m not. I mean, at least have the decency to ask your parents what they listened to 20 years ago. If you have any sense, you probably get it. You probably understand that country music is a dying genre thanks to artists like Brad Paisley (who is essentially Chris Carrabba with a cowboy hat). I’m not asking you to listen to Willie Nelson or Hank Williams. I’m realistic. Is there any real reason to dislike country music?

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